sos-fandoms:

prince-addai:

windupdolls:

trans–reality:

Hey if you’re against trans women getting uterus implants because it’s “stealing” from afab people, you’re trash

please steal my uterus i sure as fuck don’t need it if someone came by and just took it while i was sleepin that’d be rad I’ll even pay you to take it

relatable shit

Reblog if you’d happily give your uterus to a trans woman

(Source: moldyfin)

glumshoe:

gallusrostromegalus:

vampireapologist:

sinistercoffin:

vampireapologist:

Something about working in Wildlife and natural resources in general is there’s always someone who is absolutely fine working outside in like a category four hurricane, tornado coming down the road, lighting striking a nearby tree, acting like they don’t notice.

And I’d accept them and ignore their apparent death wish if not for the fact that this type of person ALWAYS is also the type of person who thinks they’re the normal one.

Tornado sirens will be going off and I’ll be like “looks like we have to call it a day”

And they’ll be like “we’ll……I mean if YOU want to go in just because it’s storming I guess we can put off this work but that’ll make it a hassle later…”

And everyone else is like you know what’s a bigger hassle

Being Dead

This is the guy who wants to finish measuring the stream when there’s literally a wildfire approaching and the firefighters are trying to evacuate us.

I’ve met this guy. I hate him.

GOD YEAH!!!!

XKCD Got You Covered:

Most people killed by lightning strikes are, you guessed it, employed in natural resources and related outdoor fields.

empgonzo:

baizenvalentine:

“In fact, during the audition with Chris Evans, the script says, “Spidey flips into scene,” and Tom goes, “Oh, should I do that?” Evans is like, [sarcastically] “Oh, yeah. Yeah, you just flip into the scene kid. No, you just walk in.” He does it. A standing flip, jump, flip, land. Even Chris Evans was like, “What…what happened?” - Kevin Feige, producer and President of Marvel

You hire Spider-Man and you fucking got Spider-Man.

siryouarebeingmocked:

portmanteau-bot:

brookishwater:

reverse portmanteau robot

takes a random word and separates it into two separate words

for example

me:

bartman

reverse portmanteau robot:

bitch fartman

bartman.

---

This portmanteau was created from phrase ‘bitch fartman’. ^{Beep-boop. Portmanteau^bot^1}

Help keep my meatbag slave alive.

(Source: calliope-lalonde)

copperbadge:

wonderfulworldofmichaelford:

kimoramay:

I was told recently about a school that was shamed into changing its school motto. The motto was “I hear, I see, I learn.” Nothing wrong with that per se. Unfortunately the motto was in Latin, and the Latin for “I hear, I see, I learn” is “audio, video, disco”.

What the fuck that’s the best school motto ever change it back

Your yearly reminder that “I learn through suffering” can be translated into Latin as “Disco Inferno.” 

mesopelagic:

insanewalkerx:

mesopelagic:

insanewalkerx:

2-face:

50% of comments on any given vegan recipe in the world: i was TERRIFIED this would be DISGUSTING and HEALTHFUL due to the fact that it did not contain any bacon. my husband was like WOMAN, WHAT ARE YOU FEEDING ME? when he saw me put something in the oven that didnt contain a whole hog but luckily it turned out edible! LOL i added 6 eggs and some milk and subbed the margarine for rendered lard so my husband wouldnt divorce me. the kids liked it too even though it wasn’t exactly like pop tarts :) 5/5

other 50% of comments on any given vegan recipe: i substituted 9 types of gluten-free flax meal for the flour. instead of the margarine i used opium and instead of the sugar i used something i found in a meteorite. added some essential oils too. really aligned my chakras 5/5

The first 50% sound like every omniscum on the earth.

isnt omniscum that watch from ben 10

I think you’re thinking of Ben 10 Omniverse, which is basically right

I was thinking of omnivores, omniscum is a nickname vegans call “normies” but that made me laugh thank you :)

i was making fun of you

fourlughero:

tilthat:

TIL Ray Bradbury first titled Fahrenheit 451 “The Fireman”, then called a local fire station to ask what temperature it would take to actually ignite books. The responding firemen placed him on hold and burnt a book, then reported that the heat required was “Fahrenheit 451″.

via reddit.com

That’s such a fire fighter thing to do.

“You know what? That’s a good question. I’m gonna put you on hold while I find out”